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For women, it's more difficult. I hope actually writing this out will provide some relief as I find it impossible to be in my own thoughts.

No one judged us and it is just so very sad that we did not get to move forward and enjoy the future we had talked about. Isolation is when you have less than no desire to go out with your friends or even leave the house. But after the pain of a breakup, this is one of the most notorious and complicated stages we face.

5 Breakup Stages

There can be many factors that lead to the breakdown of a relationship, but the process we use to get through a particularly difficult breakup are the same. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, MD, in her groundbreaking book on Death and Dying 1969 , outlined the five phases of grief experienced by people when they first learn they are dying. We often see similar reactions in people dealing with less serious traumas such as losing a job, forced relocation, disability and yes, you guessed it, relationship breakup. Understanding the five stages of grief, and the physical and emotional reactions our bodies go through during and after a breakup, can help normalise the process, and give a much greater perspective. Stage 1: Shock and denial In the early stages of a breakup, or when the decision to go separate ways is first discussed, the whole body can have a response in the wake of such a massive life change. At this stage, people can experience a range of emotions including denial, indecision, resignation, withdrawal or fatigue. Sometimes one partner is unaware of the extent of the problems, and the separation can come as a complete shock. According to world-renowned relationship expert Dr John Gottman, 40% of divorces occur not because of constant bickering, but because of a reluctance to discuss important issues. When one or both partners are avoiding conflict altogether, over time they drift apart, ultimately causing the marriage to end. An initial sense of shock quickly turns into feelings of anger and thoughts of injustice. I gave her everything and got nothing in return. He was only ever after my money. People in this stage feel rejected and abandoned and may want to blame their ex for the pain their experiencing. At the extreme end of this response are fantasies of getting even or playing the victim. Stage 3: Bargaining Some people find being alone daunting and seek comfort. This can mean a frantic search for a new partner or bargaining to get the old relationship back. Recognising the breakup for what it is, an opportunity for self-reflection, can lead to greater. Stage 5: Acceptance The final stage is one of hope, freedom and a new way of life. The time it takes to move through the five stages of a relationship breakup is different for everyone, and not every stage may be relevant for you. Breakups are hard, and feeling sad is normal, but sooner or later you need to get back out there. You deserve all the freedom and opportunities that life can present, and you certainly deserve to be happy. Filed Under: Tagged With: , ,.

I was SO beyond confused and still am. So we can get stuck there, too, and even project that for our next relationship. Stage 3: Deep sadness During this stage, they start to accept and experience what the breakup means for them. This phase is characterized by intense emotional pain, self-doubt, guilt, deep desperation, and overwhelming loneliness. Most couples have sex after a break-up or divorce. You solo on things your ex said at various times that you see as contradicting the breakup, and you hold onto them now as if they are stages of breakup anger. In no sense is this information intended to provide diagnoses or act as a substitute for the work of a qualified prime. If you give yourself time, you can eventually find yourself at the end of the grief stages, acceptance. Instead, try to involve yourself in things that give you joy, and look for the silver lining whenever possible. Isolation Isolation is exactly what it sounds like.